Momma Didn't Raise No Fool

Over the past month I have had my fair share of opportunity to think. Imagine what one person could get done during a male dry spell! Really, its amazing. Although I have no actual hard set goals - mine remain soft and fluffy, likely to be molded into something new again - I did elude to the fact that I have made several revelations on what I want. And I have. Kinda-sorta. And most of it is shallow. So don't hate. In no particular order, here are the things that I have decided on or realized.

I am ready for a boyfriend. Yes. An actual real life boyfriend! One that wants to hang out with regularity. And meet my friends. And go out on dates on Friday nights. And celebrate birthdays and holidays with. Yes, that kind of boyfriend. On the same token I'm not in any rush. You won't see me running to set up a profile on Match.com or Craig's List (ew!) any time soon. I figure it will happen when it happens.

I am not ready to stop hanging out with #2 & C. At least not yet. You might think that is contradictory to the above but really, its not. I'm in no particular rush to have a boyfriend and I am perfectly happy being single (minus the occasional instances when I self-pity and loathe it. Give me a break, its wedding season after all). I just know that I am ready - able - capable - to have a boyfriend or something more serious. But momma didn't raise no fool. I know where my bread is buttered so until Mr. Boyfriend comes around I'll keep with Plan B & Plan C for a bit longer.

I am dangerously coming close to falling for C. Yea. Again, contradictory to above statement, right? Totally. However, in my defense I have also realized that I will no longer initiate contact with him. At least for a while. S has heard this multiple times per week for the past several weeks but I'm really trying. But its hard since I like him. And I know he likes me. And besides all the b.s. he is exactly like a boyfriend when we hang out. Which is confusing. So I will be weaning myself off him, at least on my end. A little hard to get never hurt.

I need to start running. Again. But become better than I was at it before. I have found the gorgeous people. They flock to LSD after work to run. The men with their shirts off and 6-packs rippling. The ladies with virtuously no body fat. I used to be more - how should I put this - firm (I guess). Now I'm pretty soft and fluffy. This week I have attempted to get back into the swing of things. And it almost worked. Thank God for OnDemand Exercise channel. I think I'll be back in a routine by next week.

I eat too much. Its because I'm bored. I'm bored at work. The claims just aren't coming in. Since I do worker's compensation the economy is having a direct effect on my job too. Less workers = less accidents. Lay offs = less reporting of accidents. Things have been very slow. I completed a "special project" and even visited a client to discuss a particular claim. So I eat. This place is chock-full of free stuff. And I tend to take walks to the local Starbucks for my 3pm cookie. Thankfully that has stopped. But I am eating Swedish Fish like its going out of style. Then when I go home, after dinner there is nothing left to do. So I'll snack. Or drink a beer solo. Again, this week I've been trying to curb those bad habits so hopefully they are kicked by next week.

I think that is the majority of things that have been spinning around this noggin of mine. Now I am ready for the weekend. SO ready. I have worked 4 Fridays in a row! I know, I'm complaining about virtually nothing in most people's eyes. But at this company we only work every other Friday (we work really long hours to make up that time for our off Friday). My entire routine, with work & at home, is so scewed that I feel like I'm drowning in a never ending Groundhog's Day. Luckily I just worked my last Friday for three weeks. For three glorious weeks I can kick back on Fridays! Oh I am so excited. I feel like this work rut will finally work itself out and I'll be on the straightened arrow. And saner. And happier in the office. And happier at home.

Tootles!