Can a "Ken" date a "Skipper"?

+ = ?????

Laying next to C after another rousing session on Thursday night it dawned on me - he is a gorgeous guy...almost too gorgeous. He's blond, blue eyed, thin, cut, tall. He is my own real life Ken Doll (but with an actual package). And here I am, more like a Skipper Doll, but probably not as thin.

Dunken word diarrhea got the best of me in this almost perfect moment: Are you faking with me? Puzzlement washed over C's face and he asked me to explain what I meant. It was at that moment when I was finally snapped out of drunken dialog and realized I had no real clue how to explain myself - this was a personal fleeting thought not meant for him to hear or know. I tried to get out of it by brushing it off but his gaze became intense and he begged me to explain. But I couldn't put it into words. How to you tell someone that you almost feel inferior to their beauty, smarts, drive, passion? How can you say: I don't get what you see in me?

Oh, but I tried to verbalize it. It included a lot of stammering, a lot of um's & buts. I even gave my little Mattel analogy. And all the while we were still naked, spooning and basking in the glow of great sex less than 10min prior. You would think I could finagle my way out of this annoying situation that I myself created, but no. He face fell and he looked upset and hurt while I was busy digging that hole deeper and deeper. Eventually he dropped it, kissed me and said he was sad I couldn't see in myself what he sees in me.

I never though of myself as that girl that fishes for compliments or has an inferiority complex. But I have never dated a guy that is this perfect on paper and so far in person too. I guess I'm waiting for that other shoe to drop.

Luckily my crazy verbal diarrhea did not deter Ken, I mean C, from hanging out the rest of the weekend. We met up on Saturday night in Wrigley and grabbed dinner Sunday. Nothing was brought up about this again. Although it did seem as if he was even more attentive and giving out compliments more than usual. It was nice, not overkill but I hope things get back to normal asap.